67 Comments

Beautiful. Poignant

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Mar 21Liked by Jody Day

This speaks to so many of us, Jody, especially those of us who are caregivers for our loved ones. It's a labor of love, and as rich as it is challenging. Thank you for your openness, you are definitely feeding the right one.

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Mother is a verb! What a great title, and love how you describe the complexity of your relationships with the mothers in your life. Beautiful writing. I just subscribed :)

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Mar 12Liked by Jody Day

What a lovely tribute to your MIL & the other women who have mothered you over the years, dear Jody. I still think of my best friend's parents (now in their early 90s) as "my other parents," and I'm lucky to have had some wonderful aunties & great-aunties in my life, both genetic and honorary. I don't think children/young people can ever have too many caring adults in their lives!

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Mar 12Liked by Jody Day

Deeply affecting, and your writing is poetry in prose.

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Beautiful. And as a woman who honks and snorts when she laughs, I see your MIL. To never waver from taking up space in laughter is a tiny rebellion in its own right. Sending love, this was just beautiful.

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Mar 12·edited Mar 12Liked by Jody Day

You are lucky, relatively speaking.

I do not feel I have ever been loved by mothers other than my own or possibly anyone. I'm too old now to be lovable by others. I wish more than anything I could have once felt unconditional love or any love in my lifetime.

So painful to see all those here who didn't have the best mothers but managed to have children. My pain will never be understood or acknowledged.

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This is stunning x

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Although I have a wonderful mother, I have been the "adopted" daughter to many women.

This post is a beautiful reminder that blood doesn't ensure mothering.

Your mother-in-law sounds amazing.

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Wow. This is beautiful, and evocative, and makes me grieve for the poor mothering I received and have only recently recognised for what it was (at the age of 63 - until recently I was still thinking it was me...). I am lucky enough to have had two children, a daughter and a son, and with every fibre of my being was determined to give them what I didn't receive. Love.

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What a rich and beautiful essay. Thank you for sharing such deep thoughts. It’s like eating a chocolate truffle and letting it slowly melt in your mouth. I feel like you are a mother of us all with your wisdom and love. Who says that it has to have a biological attachment to be a mother.

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Wonderful, evocative writing.

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I passed this up more than once due to my difficult situation with my own mother, but found myself comming back to it mostly because becoming a Mother and being Gammy has been the most rewarding times of my life...and yet there's another side to this story...one I can't seem to see ot touch yet undeniable and no doubt a needed lesson turned blessn' , if I have the right mindset and strength to see where it lands. You have already blessed me with your words...one can never see the people they touch with our earthly vision...in a way I am mother's by you in a way already...yet join you as a sister in virtual imaginations...which is ironic considering I was the only girl with 3 brothers...never having a blood sister of my own..thank you and I'll be following along!

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Beautiful, Jody. You and this article. Thank you for sharing each of these threads and weaving them together so that we can feel your story connected in empathy - all our mothering stories unconsciously linking.

'Your mothering heart continues to give widely and unstintingly' through Gateway Elderwomen; the welcome embrace of home and empathy are part of its DNA, and yours. Sitting alongside you.

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Mar 10·edited Mar 10Liked by Jody Day

Thank you for your honest words Jody.

P.S. I tend to deploy the word 'Auntying'

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This is so beautiful and poignant Jody. Sending love as you farewell another mother figure in your life ❤️ I received a gorgeous 'mother's day' message from my 19 year old godson, that reminded me that yes, you don't have to be a biological mother to express the maternal love that is within you.

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