'The fact that I don't have children is the least interesting thing about me'
Jody's 'We Are Childfree' interview
This is one of the most candid interviews I’ve given about my route from being childfree in my teens and twenties, to spending my thirties trying to become a mother, and my forties grieving both motherhood and partnerhood.
As well as looking back on it all from my early sixties (and partnered once more), I talk about how I’m planning for my old age without children, and the Alterkin project, working with other non-parents to create a community of care in our very rural Irish location.
Pronatalism is on the rise, and likely to get a whole lot nastier in the coming years, as demographic changes have impacts that governments are totally unprepared for. Thus it’s never been more important to stand up for EVERYONE'S reproductive rights and identities, whether you are childless, childfree, a parent (or anywhere in between!) There’s often an idea that non-parents don’t care about parents and children, but that’s another pernicious myth of pronatalism.
The essay is behind a paywall, but you can access it with a 7-day free trial, and I hope you’ll stick around after that, as Zoë & James’ project is an important and vital part of both reproductive justice and social history. And so, of course, like my work always has been, it’s entirely self and community-funded! (They live in their van and keep their expenses as low as possible, but still… writers and photographers have to eat and put gas in the tank!)
Thank you to Zoë Noble for the stunning photos, and to James Glazebrook for the sensitive and elegant writing. And to both of them for coming all the way to rural Ireland to spend the weekend with me to create this piece. And most of all, thank you to both of them for the time, passion, sacrifice and commitment that make their work at We Are Childfree possible.
I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the interview.
Hugs, Jody x
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I so love this. And your words about not having children being the least interesting thing about you have been circling my mind since I read them. All too often our label of “not mother” obscures the delights and intrigues of who who we are 😀
This is a wonderful article, Jody. And I can very much relate to looking for ways to heal the pain of my childhood and thinking that having a child would do that, take away the emptiness, give me a sense of belonging. If I'd have had a child, I think I would have been shocked to realise that it didn't take away the emptiness at all. That has been an inside job and remains a work in progress. Thanks for all your pioneering work.